Working Out...Oh God..

Working out. It's something we all do at some point in our lives and it usually sucks because we are usually out of shape and feeling fat and can barely do a mile on and treadmill... Well I've been working out since I was little but not like working out at a gym like doing sports I started gymnastics at age 2 and did it until I was 12. I did dance for a while and softball. I am still in volleyball but that's it now. Next year will be my 9th year doing volleyball. I work out at a gym now as well and I have a usual routine I run about a mile on an elliptical then walk a mile and a half on a treadmill then abs and last another mile on the elliptical. It's a good time. My wonderfully bratty boyfriend however will just show up and show me up as he works out.. He also has trouble gaining weight.... This why I randomly tell him to just get out. :) But I do love him but I have no issues gaining weight so he's a butt. Working out kind of suck because there are girls there with there make up done and cute clothes! WHY!!! Why the fuck do you need to look good when you're there to get sweaty! No point or the body builders who are there and I'm like dude you are done!!!! You are skinny and you have muscles so therefore I hate you. That's my gym rant!
xoxo Megan

Quinn's Quest

So I guess it's about time to get personal. I'm going to tell you about a family that I consider my second family. My close friends Payton, Orion, and Quinn are my "siblings" Eddie and Terri are my "parents" I love them so much they are my best friends. About 3 years ago Quinn who was about 7 at the time was complaining of headaches constantly. So Terri took him to the hospital and they found a tumor on his brain stem. He was flown to Iowa City to get cancer treatment. While he was in the hospital Orion and Payton stayed with me on and off for about 5 months. Exactly one month before his 8th birthday Quinn passed away.... I found out about this at volleyball from people who barely knew Quinn's family at all. I was heart broken. I spiral into my old depression it was awful, I began to cut myself... I cried for days on end. It's been about 3 years since he died and it still kills me inside to think about it. I miss him so much my little hockey player, the cutest kid I'd ever met. He will forever be my angel. Sorry  if I bummed you out. That's my sad story
xoxo Megan

Halloween

So Halloween is just around the corner and I will be going to two different Halloween parties one Saturday and one Sunday because I do not have school Monday! Yay end of quarter! Well the first one is at one of my best friends house it's Elizabeth who has a blog also http://white-girl-diaries.blogspot.com/ it's pretty funny. Well I'm going and I'm excited because I'm gonna half-ass being Iron Man, and for the one I have Sunday I think I'm going to be a greek goddess. I will be attending both with my wonderful boyfriend,  but I think he is wearing some morph suit which I'm not exactly happy about but it's whatever I love that boy anyway. I love Halloween yummy candy, fall leaves, scary movies I love it all!!! What's your favorite thing about Halloween and/or fall?
xoxo Megan

Relationships

On saturday Austin and I made it "Facebook official" meaning we are officially boyfriend & girlfriend blah blah blah shit no one cares about. It was really sweet he got me a beautiful necklace and some yummy nice chocolate. He's absolutely amazing and I love him, but that is beside the point. Relationships are hard and they take effort you don't just have a boyfriend or girlfriend and just do whatever you want. You need to spend time together and talk. You have to communicate. One of my friends sometimes seems obsessed with relationships which you'll never be happy in a relationship if you are just searching for one you have to let it happen when it is meant to happen. Don't rush into anything and don't push for it to happen if it's meant to happen it will.

The necklace

My Exhausted Life and The Drama That Goes With It

Soooo I know I haven't posted in a while and I am very sorry I've been utterly exhausted because I think I'm getting sick and my anemia is killing me. This will not stop me from posting though! So let me tell you the story of yesterday. This will take a little bit of a back story... I have this friend Sarah and she is adorable, I love her I really do. A few days back she looks at me in english and says "your boyfriend I'd date him." this made me laugh so hard so I respond with "That's funny but he loves me sooooo yeah" she then says "that's just cause he hasn't met me yet" which I thought was sooo funny. The next day she went on his facebook then his brother's facebook then his brother's fiance's facebook and then his step mom's facebook... STALKER but it was still funny. Austin, my boyfriend, thought that this was funny but creepy considering he doesn't actually know Sarah. Well yesterday she says to me "You should give me Austin's number but not tell him it's me that'd be funny" I replied with "Yeah no Sarah that's where I draw the line." and she laughed it off. I thought she had dropped it but then at lunch I got a text from Austin saying "Sarah sent me 64 texts in less than 5 min" ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!!! I had absolutely no idea where she got his number I didn't give it to her, I knew my friends who have Austin's number wouldn't give it to her I was pissed. So I texted Sarah "Sarah who the hell gave you Austin's number?" She tries to tell me she got it online when I know he doesn't have it on his facebook or anything. I found out she got it from one of my exfriends who got it out of my friends phone without him knowing. This exfriend is an EXfriend for a reason she's a total bitch who always tried to flirt with Austin in front of me and then tell me we were "so cute together". So now this bitch Ashley has Austin's number and I'm not happy because I thought I was done with all her shit... Turns out no, but I'll be fine if I have to I'll cut a bitch. Well that was yesterday for me. I promise I'll post more often.
xoxo Megan

One of my favorite poems

This is a poem I had to find for school and fell in love with because it made me think about the people I'd lost...Specifically a very close friend of mine.. I'll tell you more about him another day.

Who Would You Be Today?

Joel Mckeown

Could you imagine a pain so deep down inside

That it can not be summarized in words you simply can write

A pain that touches your toes and up to the top of the ceiling

You can’t eat, you can’t sleep, that is the pain that I am feeling

But my father raised a boy that can stand on his own

But these different circumstances has got me feeling alone

All the doctors and the nurses say you’re dead and you’re gone

But it still feels like I could talk to you if I picked up the phone

You can’t fix a broken window you just replace the pane.

But there is no pain great enough to replace your face

With my eyes matted shut from the tears that I slept on

I thank God for the pictures and your voice on my cell phone.

But please, while you are awed in the mist of the Lord

Don’t forget all your friends and time spent on this world.

I will never have a friend like you ever again.

My heart is a vault now, I’m scared to let people in.

No matter how many oceans or rivers I cry

My heart will never let you go, I’ll never say good bye.

A lot of my hours are now spent in the place where you lay

As I sit crying, wondering, who would you be today.

Love.

The topic of love is a tricky thing. It's so complicated, sometimes you fall for someone and sometimes you fall in love with someone. There is a huge difference between the two but sometimes you do both for/with one person. When you fall for someone you just really like them and you can't guarantee that it will ever actually be love, but you know you care about them. When you fall in love with someone you know in your heart that you love them pretty much right away. It's kind of hard because you just want to say it but you don't want to rush anything. I've only been in love with one person and he's the most amazing person I've ever met. It's a wonderful feeling being in love. It's probably the happiest I've ever been. It's weird to be telling people I most likely don't know about this because it's so personal but it's good to talk about. Don't think that you need someone else to feel happy. You have to be happy with yourself first or it will never work out. Never ever think that you need someone else to be happy you can be very happy by yourself, better to be happy alone than sad in a relationship.
xoxo Megan

Math class and all it's evilness

I'm a junior in High School and it pretty much sucks. I HATE a lot of people in my grade they are mostly slutty, stuck up, rich bitches, and they're all stupid. But that's beside the point. The point is that being a junior I am in algebra 2 and don't get me wrong I'm good at math and I like algebra and solving equations (I know I'm nerdy) but seriously my teacher is killing me!! She does an okay job at teaching but she is so boring and isn't always the best at explaining how you get certain answers. I sit in the back, and I don't do anything because I basically already know all this crap from algebra 1. This is all such bullshit I need her to not be so boring and actually teach! It's also the last period of the day so you have got to be more interesting if you expect anyone to actually pay attention. That's me ranting about math class.
xoxo Megan

The Homecoming Hangover

Homecoming takes a lot out of you and you get kind of "hangover" whether thats literally or just metaphorically. Some girls took it to the extreme and went out drinking and got busted but didn't written up. These people got totally shit faced even though over half of them are starting varsity athletes and could have cost their teams chances at state or staying undefeated or whatever. Word of advice don't be a dumbass if you feel the need to party and get drunk don't be in a sport because if you're in a sport it isn't just about you! It's about the whole team. I have no sympathy for these people who brought this totally upon themselves, they are stupid and I wish they had gotten written up and what not. On the other side of things there is the metaphorical side of the Homecoming Hangover which is the week after homecoming where all you want to do is sleep and be lazy. You have no motivation to do anything. That is me right now I have no motivation. I slept so well last night! I just want to curl up and go back to sleep. That's the Homecoming Hangover.
xoxo Megan